It's understandable to feel confused and intrigued by your recurring dreams of Leah, especially since they evoke such strong emotions. Dreams often serve as a canvas for our subconscious thoughts and feelings, allowing us to explore aspects of our lives that we may not fully acknowledge while awake.

1. Symbolism of Leah: Leah may symbolize a part of yourself or your past that you are reconnecting with. Since you spent significant time together in high school, she could represent your younger self or a time in your life that you associate with growth, creativity, or even unfulfilled potential. The emotional connection you feel in these dreams could be a reflection of your desire for acceptance, connection, or a sense of belonging.
2. Unresolved Feelings: Your thoughts about possibly having suppressed feelings for Leah due to external pressures, like your mother's disapproval, are valid. Dreams can bring unresolved emotions to the surface. It’s possible that your dreams are exploring what a relationship with Leah could have felt like, allowing you to experience the happiness and connection you may have longed for but didn’t pursue at that time.
3. Longing and Nostalgia: The overwhelming sense of sadness you feel upon waking may stem from nostalgia for simpler times or a longing for deep connections that you felt were missing in your life. The dreams might be amplifying these feelings, giving you a chance to explore them in a safe space.
4. Past Life Connection: While the idea of a past life connection is a personal belief, it’s important to consider that these dreams might instead be a manifestation of your subconscious mind dealing with current emotions and memories rather than a literal past life connection.
5. Creative Exploration: Leah's artsy and extroverted nature could represent qualities you admire or wish to integrate into your own personality. The dreams may be encouraging you to explore these traits or to express yourself more freely, especially in creative pursuits.

To gain clarity, consider keeping a dream journal. Write down your dreams and any emotions or thoughts that arise after waking. This practice can help you identify patterns and themes over time. Additionally, reflecting on your past relationships and how they were influenced by your family dynamics may provide further insight.

Ultimately, the recurring dreams appear to be a rich source of material for self-exploration and understanding. Embrace them as an opportunity to connect with your past and explore your inner emotional landscape.